Its been almost a week since I started on the thyroid medication. Its been.. quite the experience to say the least. I’ve found myself ridiculously sensitive - like crying at the drop of a hat on things that would usually never really phase me too much. The fluctuations between extreme exhaustion and being normal are pretty prominent now as well.
I keep getting told that this is all a good thing. It means that the medication is slowly starting to work its way into my body and starting to take effect. I really truly hope thats true. I don’t know how much more I can take of being such a huge basket case.
Credit to my husband (lobster) for having the patience of a saint and putting up with me being hysterical over the littlest things lately.
There is this saying “you don’t really know what you have till it is gone” - I’m starting to see how true that is in my life these days.
No one really knows but we’ve actually started actively trying to get pregnant. We finally had the talk and decided it was time - we can’t spend the rest of our lives waiting to have ‘enough’ money. So far we’ve been able to pay all our bills, rent and student loans and still be able to save a decent amount and have money leftover at the end of it. I believe we’re never given more than we can handle and if we’re meant to get pregnant then we will - and it will be okay.
Well, having said that.... now with this thyroid issue. We’ve had to put the pregnancy on the backburner - indefinitely. My hormones are so far out of whack right now its not even funny. To add a pregnancy to that, I feel, would send me right over the edge. I feel like I need time to get a handle on this disease with the medication and all but at the same time I feel so cheated with this. Almost every couple I know now is pregnant, trying or very close to expecting. While I am unbelievably happy and excited for them all, it leaves me feeling quite... hollow (?)
We had been hoping to have good news for our families by this christmas and now it looks like that will not be a possibility for us. I would be lying through my teeth if I said I wasn’t disappointed. I am.... in fact.. devastated. Yes, us getting pregnant is not ruled out completely but this just feels like yet another block in the road. I am hoping that the medication and herbal remedies that I’ve been on will help stabalize me enough to then move forward with this next part of our lives.
1 comments:
Don't lose hope hon. I have a good friend with a similar condition. She's also on medication. She is now pregnant with her 4th! Even the doctor was taken aback! You're doing the right thing by giving yourself time. If that's what you feel like you need, that's what you should do.
As far as other worries, when I was pregnant the first time, my mom told me every child brings their own Kismet. You have to have faith that things will fall into place. My son was born in June and in August, my husband started a new job that paid substantially more. It worked out. It always does.
I'll be visiting regularly so keep posting!
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